How did The Bluffington Roach get started?
What’s up folks! My name is Myke Lewham. I’m a 28-year-old writer, and I graduated from Macrapolis University with a degree in journalism. Ever since my college days, I’ve had a passion for investigating why people have gotten so fucking dumb — especially since we have the potential to be really smart. I took a particular interest in black people’s stupidity.

The Bluffington Roach exists today because my passion led me to cross paths with one of the greatest minds of our time — none other than the late, great J.B. Bluffington. About three years ago, I read his book: What’s Wrong with Ya’ll Niggas? Get Your Shit Together!. The book had such a profound impact on me, that I decided to reach out to Mr. Bluffington. And, as fate would have it, I wound up studying under his tutelage up until the time he died seven months ago.

He schooled me on so many different things. He introduced me to a whole new paradigm for viewing the world. And, even though he was always the teacher in my eyes, we interacted as if we were intellectual equals — like life-long friends really.

A few months before Mr. Bluffington passed away, he started badgering me about starting my own news publication. I was reporting for the Macrapolis Tribune at the time. Even with the newspaper industry in  flux, I felt more certain about my job there than I did about my own ability to build something. I didn’t feel like I was ready. He kept pressing me about it, and I kept coming up with excuses not to do it.

Finally about two weeks before his death, he called me over to his house to pick up “something very important.” He handed me an envelope and told me not to open it until I got home. He must have known he was very sick at that point. I noticed that he seemed under-the-weather, but I figured that he had a regular ol’ cold or something. He went into the hospital one week later. The next week he was gone.

In that envelope was a check with a memo, which simply read: “It’s time.” Now we’re here today, and The Bluffington Roach is finally up and running.

What separates The Bluffington Roach from the other news organizations out there?
We offer a weekly online news magazine that delivers invaluable information to the people. Our mission is simple: We want to provide black people living in Macrapolis with uncompromised truth.

BluffRo investigates the most pressing and pertinent news concerning our people and the city at-large. Right now, our editorial staff is only a two-person band. It consists of me and the photographer, De’ Finley Notsquiat. So, we’re forced to focus more on quality than quantity. We do in-depth and thoughtful reporting.

Do you really expect people to pay for your content?
There’s no such thing as free in this world. You’d be hard pressed to come up with two more precious commodities in this world than time and attention. People who make a lot of money know that. That’s why they’re willing to spend millions of dollars for just a fraction of your time and attention. Those two things are more valuable to them than they are to you.

We’re not here to con you out of your time. All we want is $8.89  in exchange for access to our hard work. It was really David Banner’s 2M1 movement that inspired us to structure the site like this. The goal of his movement was to get two million people to give at least $1 for his mix-tape, which he put album-like effort and resources into creating.

If you like what we do than $9 shouldn’t be much for you to give. To put things in perspective, $9 is pretty much half of a drink at the club, $2 less than a ticket for a matinee movie, three one-way trips on the train, a few blocks in a yellow cab, or two bootleg movies for a bargain price.

Will BluffRo report with the same blunt and brutally honest style that J.B. Bluffington was known for?
The spirit of Mr. Bluffington very much lives on in the publication. BluffRo is dedicated to getting to the truth of things. We don’t tackle sensitive subjects for the sake of shock value. We tackle them because they need to be addressed. And, we approach every story with thoughtfulness and balance — with the ultimate goal of getting to the truth. We may not always get there, but that is our aim.
Is the magazine prepared for the backlash that such a style might generate?
For one, there will be no backlash. Secondly, anyone who considers criticizing our work should remember that no one likes a digital activist. It’s fucking lazy. There are far more serious causes to fight out there. And, if you’re not out there fighting them in the real-world, then no one wants to hear the profound moral thoughts you’ve decided to share inside the comment section of a website. Wait…I stand corrected; no one wants to hear those regardless. Political correctness is not truth. It’s often far from it. So, your socially acceptable political correctness is not welcome here.
Macrapolis City is the second most populous city in the country. The city is most commonly referred to as Macrapolis. Macrapolis consists of four boroughs. Those four boroughs — Clarkelyn, Kings, The Onx, and Panhattan — were consolidated into a single city on August 17, 1887. With a census-estimated 2012 population of 7,714,821 people distributed over a land area of just 401.49 square miles, Macrapolis is the second most densely populated major city in the country. The Tibetan Bald Roach is the city’s official animal. Macrapolis is located on the border of New York City, New Jersey, and Who-Gives-a-Shit-It’s-Clearly-Not-a-Real-Place.

Macrapolis is one of the world’s foremost breeding grounds for dopeness and has been described as the cultural capital of the world. The city’s dopeness impacts commerce, finance, media, art, fashion, research, technology, education, and entertainment on a global scale.

Okay…You caught us! The Bluffington Roach is really a weekly satirical online news magazine. The Bluffington Roach Volume I one of America’s fastest growing fictional cities.

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It’s just jokes

We sincerely hope you have already realized this by now, but in case you have not, The Bluffington Roach is a satirical and fictionally-based online news parody magazine. In other words, the stories are fake.

The sole purpose of the site is entertainment and amusement. The majority of characters and institutions appearing in this work, even those based on real public persons and well-known institutions, are fictitious. Any resemblance to real private persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. We occasionally use real-life public officials, public figures, and/or institutions in stories. Any references and/or storylines surrounding them are purely fictional and satirical.

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We don’t give a shit about yours story ideas. If you decide to be an asshole and offer up ideas anyway, remember that anything users publish to the site, or send to us through other channels of communication (email or social media for example) will be made available to Bluffington Roach Media for unconditional use. You waive any rights to user-generated content submitted to Bluffington Roach Media. We reserve the right to edit, remove, modify, publish, transmit, and display that content in any manner we choose.

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We do not share personal information with third-parties nor do we store information we collect about your visit to this blog other than for the purpose of analyzing content performance through the use of cookies, which you can turn off at any time by modifying your Internet browser’s settings. The email addresses we obtain for users who register with site, will be used only for occasional communication about future products, new content, or exclusive deals. Such information will not be shared with third parties.

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Recently Updated: 9/18/2014
Previously Updated: 3/5/2014


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