Terms of Service

By visiting, using, and/or registering an account with the BluffingtonRoach.com (“The Bluffington Roach”, “BluffRo”, “site”, ”we”, “us”, or “our”) the user ( “you”, “your”) agrees to fully abide by the site’s terms of service and privacy policies. BluffingtonRoach.com is owned and operated by Bluffington Roach Media. These terms and conditions of use are subject to change at any time and without notice.

It’s just jokes

We sincerely hope you would have already realized this by now, but in case you have not, The Bluffington Roach is a satirical and fictionally-based online news parody magazine. In other words, the stories are fake.

The sole purpose of the site is entertainment and amusement. The majority of characters and institutions appearing in this work, even those based on real public persons and well-known institutions, are fictitious. Any resemblance to real private persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. We occasionally use real-life public officials, public figures, and/or institutions in stories. Any references and/or storylines surrounding them are purely fictional and satirical.

Intellectual Property: Don’t be a thief or a meat-rider!

Before you decide to be a dishonorable opportunist and shamelessly rip off our stories. Remind yourself of the following: The site and all of its contents are intended for your personal and non-commercial use only. All contents published on the site, (including but not limited to stories, illustrations, graphics, pictures and photographs) are protected by copyright in accordance with U.S. and international copyright laws.

All such contents are exclusively owned, operated, and distributed by The Bluffington Roach and its owner, Bluffington Roach Media. All Users agree not to publish, create new works from, distribute, display, or transmit the site’s published content without written consent from the site’s owners. The content is intended solely for the personal, non-commercial use of site subscribers and viewers of free content.

Parental Advisory

The use of this site is intended for mature audiences only. The purchase of a subscription to this site is intended for individuals over the age of 18. The Bluffington Roach is not responsible for any damages that may arise due to a subscriber misrepresenting his or her age.

User Conduct: Act like you’ve got some damn sense!

BluffingtonRoach.com subscribers and visitors are more than welcome to engage in discussion about the site’s content in comment sections or others available forums on the site. But, act like you’ve been raised right, and avoid publishing any libelous, defamatory, pornographic, or overly abusive user-generated content to the site.

You’re welcome to use some foul language, but if we feel that you’ve crossed the line by demeaning, threatening, or harassing other users, we reserve the right to remove the user-generated content. We also reserve the right to terminate your account and prohibit your access to the site, without refund, if any of the Terms of Service are violated.

User-Generated Content: We don’t give a shit about your story ideas!

We don’t give a shit about yours story ideas. And, unless we ask for feedback about the site, we don’t want that either. If you decide to be an asshole and offer up ideas anyway, remember that anything users publish to the site, or send to us through other channels of communication (email or social media for example) will be made available to Bluffington Roach Media for unconditional use. You waive any rights to user-generated content submitted to Bluffington Roach Media. We reserve the right to edit, remove, modify, publish, transmit, and display that content in any manner we choose.

Damage Liability

We take the protection and security of your property very seriously. Unfortunately, the Internet and electronic technology is never 100 percent predictable or reliable. Thus, we are not liable for any damage, loss of data, corruption of any data, information, material, or viruses that may infect your computer equipment or other property as a result of visiting our site. We are not responsible for any injury, loss, claim, damage, or any indirect, incidental or consequential damages of any kind that may arise while visiting the site. Nor are we responsible for any subsequent monetary losses that may result from such damages.

Privacy: We try to mind our own damn business!

We do not share personal information with third-parties nor do we store information we collect about your visit to this blog other than for the purpose of analyzing content performance through the use of cookies, which you can turn off at any time by modifying your Internet browser’s settings. Paying subscribers are able to access the site’s premium content by logging into their social media accounts on Twitter or Facebook and are not required to create an account with the site. Payments for subscription to the website are processed through the digital payment service, PayPal. The Bluffington Roach is not liable for any issues that may arise from the use of these third-party services. The privacy policy is subject to change at any time and we’ll make a reasonable effort to notify users when any changes occur.